Author Topic: Jesus  (Read 13634 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Online Hector McFreckle

  • Public Relations / Statistician Officer
  • Global Moderator
  • Rock Elite
  • ******
  • Posts: 2901
  • Thanked: 157 times
  • Karma: 142
Jesus
« on: Wed 17 Sep 2008 04:50:20 »
I hope these don't offend ! .... (All in good fun)  ;) :D :D





Eat your peas !! :)
 

Offline Dr Keats

  • Patron
  • ***
  • Posts: 130
  • Karma: 16
  • As heard on Plenty Valley FM and Inner FM...
    • Further information...
Re: Jesus
« Reply #1 on: Fri 26 Sep 2008 01:32:18 »
To quote Billy Connolly - "If Jesus was Jewish, why did he have a Mexican first name?".

Makes me wonder - do Muslims have Christian names?
If ignorance is bliss, how come I ain't smilin'?
 

Online Hector McFreckle

  • Public Relations / Statistician Officer
  • Global Moderator
  • Rock Elite
  • ******
  • Posts: 2901
  • Thanked: 157 times
  • Karma: 142
Re: Jesus
« Reply #2 on: Fri 26 Sep 2008 02:47:27 »

Makes me wonder - do Muslims have Christian names?

Good point there Doc !  ;D


Chiko Vincent - My name's already on the Guest List !!  ;D ;D
Eat your peas !! :)
 

Offline Vtroll

  • Rock Addict
  • ****
  • Posts: 306
  • Karma: 28
Re: Jesus
« Reply #3 on: Thu 09 Oct 2008 18:40:35 »
I hope these don't offend ! .... (All in good fun)  ;) :D :D




You could imagine this would be a great way for a priest to get the interest of the young soccer fans in a congregation .....
 

Offline Dr Keats

  • Patron
  • ***
  • Posts: 130
  • Karma: 16
  • As heard on Plenty Valley FM and Inner FM...
    • Further information...
Re: Jesus
« Reply #4 on: Sat 25 Oct 2008 08:20:47 »
Jesus and Moses, both old men by now, are out fishing on the Red Sea one day..

They've had a few, and are reminiscing about the great old times they had when they were young.

Jesus says, "Hey Moses - ever do any of the cool shit you used to do when you were young?".

Moses replies, "Yeah... still part the sea occasionally. You?"

"Nah", says Jesus, "Been ages. Forgotten how".

"Rubbish", says Moses. "Come on, let's see if you can still walk on water".

Jesus is just tanked enough to give it a go. Gets up on the side if the boat, takes a deep breath, steps onto the water.

Sinks like a stone...

"Ah shit...", says Moses. Parts the sea, reaches in, grabs Jesus by the scruff of the neck, and hauls him back aboard.

They look at each other for a few seconds.

"So, what happened there?" asks Moses.

Jesus looks down and says "I keep forgetting those bloody nail-holes in me feet..."
If ignorance is bliss, how come I ain't smilin'?
 

Offline Beergut

Re: Jesus
« Reply #5 on: Wed 12 Nov 2008 20:41:49 »
What were they thinking...



Never stand between a tree and a dog
 

Offline Dr Keats

  • Patron
  • ***
  • Posts: 130
  • Karma: 16
  • As heard on Plenty Valley FM and Inner FM...
    • Further information...
Re: Jesus
« Reply #6 on: Thu 13 Nov 2008 07:39:42 »
Hmmm... someone else had a similar idea:

If ignorance is bliss, how come I ain't smilin'?