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A Tale Of Two Prawns (real groaner LOL)

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Rosie125:
 Up there in the tropical waters of north Queensland , two prawns were swimming around in the sea.  One was called Justin and the other  Christian.
The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that inhabited the area.

Finally one day Justin said to Christian, 'I'm fed up with being a prawn; I wish I was a shark, and then I wouldn't have any worries about being eaten.'

A large mysterious cod appeared and said, 'Your wish is granted.' Lo and behold, Justin turned into a shark. Horrified, Christian immediately swam away, afraid of being eaten by his old mate.

Time passed (as it does) and Justin found life as a shark boring and lonely.  All his old mates simply swam away whenever he came close to them.
Justin didn't realize that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight.

While swimming alone one day he saw the cod again and he thought perhaps the mysterious fish could change him back into a prawn. He approached the cod and begged to be changed back, and, lo and behold, he found himself turned back into a prawn.  With tears of
joy in his tiny little eyes Justin swam back to his friends and bought them all a cocktail.

(The punch line does not involve a prawn cocktail - it's much worse.)

Looking around the gathering at the reef he realized he couldn't see his old pal. 'Where's Christian?' he asked.
'He's at home, still distraught that his best friend changed sides to the enemy & became a shark', came the reply.

Eager to put things right again and end the mutual pain and torture, he set off to Christian's abode. As he opened the coral gate, memories came flooding back. He banged on the door and shouted, 'It's me, Justin, your old friend, come out and see me again.'

Christian replied, 'No way man, you'll eat me. You're now a shark, the enemy, and I'll not be tricked into being your dinner.'

Justin cried back 'No, I'm not. That was the old me. I've changed.'

(You're going to love this.)




'I've found Cod. I'm a Prawn again Christian.'

Vtroll:
 :-\ Okay .... who let Rosie in here telling jokes?

Rosie125:
Careful, I'm heavily armed with them and ready to fire! :D

Meglos:
OK I shouldn't have, but I laughed.

Beergut:
In a similar vein (no pun intended)

Tired of constantly being broke & stuck in an unhappy  marriage, a
young husband decided to solve both problems  by taking out a large
insurance policy on his wife with  himself as the beneficiary, and then
arranging to have her killed.

A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a nefarious dark-side
underworld figure who went by the name of 'Artie.'
Artie then explained to the husband that his going price  for snuffing
out a spouse was $5,000.
The husband said he was willing to pay that amount, but  that he
wouldn't have any cash on hand until he could collect  his wife's
insurance money.

Artie insisted on being paid at least something up front,  so the man
opened his wallet, displaying the single dollar bill that  rested
inside. Artie sighed, rolled his eyes, & reluctantly  agreed to accept
the dollar as down payment for the dirty deed.
A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the  local
Woolworths store. There, he surprised her in the  produce department &
proceeded to strangle her with his  gloved hands & as the poor
unsuspecting woman drew her  last breath & slumped to the floor........

The manager of the produce department stumbled unexpectedly  onto the
murder scene. Unwilling to leave any living witnesses  behind, ol' Artie
had no choice but to strangle the produce manager as  well.
However, unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were captured by the
hidden security cameras & observed by the store's security guard,  who
immediately called the police. Artie was caught & arrested  before he
could even leave the store.

Under intense questioning at the police station, Artie  revealed the
whole sordid plan, including his unusual  financial arrangements with
the hapless husband who was also quickly  arrested.

The next day in the newspaper, the headline declared ....


(keep going)


 

 

 



'ARTIE CHOKES 2 for $1.00 AT WOOLWORTHS!'

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