A man, on his way home from work was stuck in traffic which was much worse than usual. Noticing a policeman walking among the stalled cars, he asked, "Officer, what's the holdup?" The policeman says: "Brendan Fevola is so depressed about his behaviour at the Brownlow that he's stopped his car and is threatening to douse himself in petrol and set himself on fire. He says everyone hates him. His wife is leaving him and taking everything and he's going to lose his $750,000 contract at Carlton. I'm walking around taking up a collection for him." "Oh, really?" the man says. "How much have you collected so far?" so far only 18 litres, but a lot of people are still siphoning.
Q: What do Fev and a bottle of beer have in common?
A: They're both empty from the neck up.
Fev is staggering home after Brownlow night when he's stopped by a policeman, who asks him "Have you any ID?"
Fev replies "Bout What?"
Fev leaves the Brownlow after-party and decides he needs another drink. He staggers through the front door of a bar. Obviously drunk, he lurches up to the bar, seats himself on a stool and, with a belch, asks the bartender for a beer. The bartender politely informs Fev that it appears that he has already had plenty to drink. He would not be served additional liquor at this bar, but could get a cab called for him. Fev is annoyed, grumbles, climbs down off the bar stool, and staggers out the front door. A few minutes later, Fev stumbles in through the side door of the bar. He wobbles up to the bar and hollers for a beer. The bartender comes over and still politely, but more firmly, refuses to serve him due to his inebriation. Again, the bartender offers to call a cab for him. Fev looks at the bartender for a moment angrily, curses, and shows himself out the side door, all the while grumbling and shaking his head. A few minutes later, Fev returns, bursts in through the back door of the bar. He plops himself up on a bar stool, gathers his wits, and belligerently orders a beer. The bartender comes over and emphatically reminds him that he is clearly drunk, will not be served a drink and either a cab or the police will be called immediately. Fev looks at the bartender and yells at him in a rage, "Man! How many bars do you work at?"
