I ran a pretty successful computer business for ten years. Some of you old timers may have heard of it...it was called LaserBaud, we were the Australian agent for USRobotic modems. I had many funny and embarrassing situations with computer n00bz.
One memorable case (pun intended) was when I sold some memory for a computer upgrade to a customer. These were the days of memory chips and not the SIMM or DIMM memory modules common these days. Anyway they usually came on a piece of foam which was wrapped in foil (for anti-static purposes) and the chip legs were simply just embedded into the foil. The customer buys the memory and refuses to lets us do the computer upgrade. Next day he complains on the phone that we blew up his computer. I try and calm him down and ask him to bring the computer in. He brings in the computer and it reaks. Is always bad news because it means something is blown or burnt. I open the lid up and peek inside. To my horror, as my jaw dropped to the floor....I find that he has trimmed the foil neatly around the memory chips and mounted the chips into the sockets with the foil intact.
We also were very big sellers of Creative Labs Sound Blaster sound cards in those days. We had one customer that complained that his card gave a constant humming noise in his speakers. No problems, just bring it in and we'll give him a brand new sound card. So this happens 2 or 3 times. Eventually I suggested to bring his computer in, as their must be a ground problem or something wrong with his speakers. He brings his computer in and I notice their is something rattling loose inside. I open his computer to find a stale sausage with a wire attached to it. WTF! I ask him what is this rancid piece of pork doing inside his computer. He says...."when I touch this wire with my finger the humming stops....I thought a sausage would work!"
